Just what is the remedy for a broken heart

The Remedy For A Broken Heart



Unless you have been lucky, you have probably been badly hurt when a relationship ended. Just what is the remedy for a broken heart?

Your first step is to see if your relationship can be salvaged. Sometimes in the heat of the situation we can do things we later regret. Perhaps you dumped your other half but now think you were too hasty. Why not see will he or she take you back? It is worth apologising and asking for another chance if you feel this person is your significant other.

It may be that you both said things that you regret. Often couples can come under severe stress due to financial worries, concerns over children, health and not to mention job related stress. Consequently resulting in unfair treatment to one another, which then leads to the possible breakup. Evaluate if this is one of the primary problems and then determine if your relationship is worth saving. If it is you can go to counselling for unbiased help and advice. It is worth a shot as getting back together with your loved one is a very good remedy for a broken heart.

Sometimes though a relationship ends and it is final. Yes, you will feel like you could never be happy again but with time your feelings will change. Treat the period after a difficult breakup exactly like you would if that person had died. Allow yourself time to grieve for what you have lost; but then acknowledge it is time to move on.

You need to look after yourself. Why not take that holiday you always wanted or go visit some family and friends. Make changes to your daily routine. Your life will be different now so instead of approaching it with fear, grab this opportunity with both hands. Who knows, something or someone better may just be around that next corner.

I do not believe that we only have one soul mate in life. Sure partners who meet when they are teenagers and are still together in their eighties are great. But there are other twosomes out there who may have made mistakes in their respective pasts, but have now found happiness again. We change as people as we travel through the journey of life. Sometimes our significant other changes as well and as a couple we adapt and stick together. Often though, we find we want different things and while you may be heartbroken at first, you may ultimately be happier with someone else or even on your own.

If you find that your heartbreak is overwhelming, please speak to someone. There are plenty of counsellors and charities that help those who are suffering from a broken heart. Consider helping others as well. When we go and visit sick people in hospital, help out at a children’s school or visit elderly neighbours, we often forget about our own problems.

It is very easy to wallow in feelings of sadness, but that will only breed despair. Life is too short to be miserable. You have complete control over your feelings. So get out there and find yourself the best remedy for a broken heart.
Monica Watts-Hopkins,MpsyD-c, FLE, BSHA
Contact Sites!
http://www.premarriage.com

Im an Invincible Dragonfly, Symbol of Wealth and Happiness

When Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade!But I know that life can be tough and never more so than right now when every time you turn on the TV or glance at a newspaper you're bombarded by messages of doom and gloom from the media.
It's all too easy to let the general negativity get to you and before you know it, even you are starting to believe that there's no way to protect yourself from the hard times that the 'powers that be' are assuring us are already here. And once you give in to this kind of 'what's the point' thought pattern, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You Must Never Allow Yourself to Give in to NegativityFor example, you've a bad day at work. Maybe the boss yells at you because she's under pressure to perform. Your commute is tiring and frustrating. And when you get home it's only to find a pile of bills in the mail box and an empty refrigerator!
sometimes all it takes is a few days like this before your attitude takes a turn for the worse. Soon you're not only anticipating negative news every time you stick your head out from under the bedclothes, but, lo and behold, this is what you actually get because the Universe delivers what you expect!

Im an Invincible Dragonfly, Symbol of Wealth and HappinessJapan was once known as 'Akitsushima' or 'Land of the Dragonflies' and it's such an inspiring symbol of wealth and power that the Dragonfly is still Japan's national emblem. The Dragonfly represents renewal after great hardship. Indeed there's no better illustration of powerful regeneration than Japan's transformation from the defeat and destruction of World War II to the prosperous, secure and peaceful nation of today. Even in the face of extreme natural disasters like earthquakes and tsunamis, the Japanese people, with their belief in the power of the dragonfly, are resilient and keep their energy positive in order to move forward to successful outcomes.

So great was the belief that the Dragonfly had the power to bring success and prosperity that the mighty Samurai warriors decorated their armor with images of the Dragonfly. Even today, Japanese farmers believe that an abundance of Dragonflies in their rice fields means they can expect an equally abundant harvest.

This wonderful Japanese legend illustrates just why the Dragonfly is such a revered symbol of good fortune.
Monica WHB,MpsyD-c, FLE, BSHA,OM
Contact Sites!
http://Therapists.PsychologyToday.com/rms/91210
http://www.premarriage.com

Warning Signs - Emotional Affair

Warning Signs - Emotional Affair - Spot Them Quickly

If you are worried about your spouse and fear that you see some warning signs emotional affair than there are a few things that you can be on the lookout for. Just remember that it's very easy to let your imagination run away with you. You have to be careful to not see things that aren't really there.

Many of the tips I'm about to give you can be signs of an affair but they can also be innocent and may not mean a thing. Just don't risk making things worse by assuming something that may not be the case. If something seems wrong don't accuse your spouse, instead open a dialog with them and ask them about your concerns.

In some ways emotional affairs can be the most damaging. It may actually be a little easier to forgive a physical indiscretion since it didn't mean anything anyway, but an emotional connection with another person is particularly upsetting and hard to get over.

Here are a few possible indicators that something is going on:

1. Your spouse suddenly starts working out or has a sudden interest in wearing new and nicer clothes. Again, this might be totally innocent but if it seems like it is coming out of the blue than it may be a sign of trouble.

2. If your spouse seems to be spending a lot more time at work than normal. A lot of sudden overtime may be a sign that something is going on. Keep your eyes open and don't accuse, but it can't hurt to talk.

3. If your spouse suddenly starts talking about a co worker a lot. If all of a sudden you are hearing your spouse talk about the same person and there is a lot of affection in their tone, it may be a sign of an emotional affair. Sometimes an emotional affair can sneak up on people. Even if your spouse is starting to have feelings for someone, they may not realize just what is going on yet; all the more reason to not jump down their throats.

4. If your spouse is suddenly very private about their phone conversations and computer habits, it is a strong indicator that they are doing something they don't want you to know about. You need to find out what that "something" is (or who it is).

It's all too easy to slowly have an attraction grow between two people who spend a lot of time together and have a lot in common. That's why work place affairs happen so often. But before you run off and accuse your spouse of something that you think they have done, you had better be sure or you can really make a mess of your marriage.

Looking for warning signs emotional affair? If you are at that point it's very likely that something has happened to make you suspicious. You know the saying "where there's smoke there's fire" so assuming that you aren't just overly paranoid and jealous, by the time you start to get suspicious it's likely that there is something happening.

But before you run off and accuse your spouse of something that you think they have done, you had better be sure or you can really make a mess of your marriage.

Monica Watts-Hopkins,MpsyD-c, FLE, BSHA,OM
Contact Sites!
http://www.premarriage.com/
http://Therapists.PsychologyToday.com/rms/91210

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Action Speak Louder than Words ….What does your Spouse Body Language Say!

Action Speak Louder than Words ….What does your Spouse Body Language Say!Body language is usually more informative than words. Words by other people usually tell you what other people WANT to say, while body posture usually tells, what they really feel and think. They express for example emotions, thoughts and how they think. It is easier to lie with words, than with body language.
"When you change your body language, people will respond in a different way."
Consequences of Body Language.
Psychologists have found out that when people try to simulate body language, they change many other things. By walking more upright, people may really feel more confident. When body language is changed, people will respond different to these changes. Body language, therefore, has consequences for the interaction with other people.

Examples of body language.

Meeting People
When you meet a person for the first time, the first 10 seconds will give an impression, which to a large extent will determine whether you will like this person or not. In these first ten seconds, you will notice impressions like nervousness, seriousness, etc. These first seconds will also influence to a large extent the rest of the conversation and any further contacts. Therefore the first impression is very important.

"The first ten seconds of a meeting determine the impression you make on other people."
Eyes
An important factor in the first contact is the eyes. The eyes should look at the person. If you want to impress the person, you should open your eyes slightly more than usual, since raising the eye brows gives people the impression that they are welcome. After the first "hello", you should maintain eye contact, which prevents the impression of nervousness with the other person. You should also smile and look friendly.

First Meeting
During the first meeting, it is good to look carefully at the other person. If he or she disapproves your behavior, you should adapt your behavior. Also, behavior should be appropriate for the situation. For example, a firm and long hand shaking is quite usual for meeting a friend you have not seen for a long time, but quite inappropriate on a funeral.

Reading body signals.

The way you breathe.
By breathing you not only provide oxygen for the body. Breathing also reflects how you feel. When you are nervous or angry you will breathe faster, and when you are sad you often breathe in jerks. Like when you are crying.
Your breathings are also signs: when you want to interrupt a speaking person you can do that by inhaling loudly and shortly, a loud sigh means that you understand the thing that is being told to you.

Shrugged shoulders.
You can recognize stressed shoulders by the fact that they are a bit shrugged, which does make the head look smaller. The meaning of the signal comes from crouching in dangerous situations.
The meaning of this posing depends on the combination. In combination with big eyes it means that someone is concerned about something that is going to happen. In combination with a face that is turned away it means that the person wants to be left alone. An introvert person has nearly always those stressed shoulders.

Difference in level of both shoulders.
By most of the people the left and the right shoulder are of the same height. When they are not, it often means that someone doubts about what he is going to do. With this movement we simulate (unconscious) that we are weighing the possibilities. Sometimes when someone makes this movement, his head will move a little like he is looking above.
–> What proportion of your communication is non-verbal?
The answer most body language experts agree on is between 60% and 75%.
There is frequently confusion about this due to the generalization of
the “93/7 experiment”. More on how you can use this to your advantage a little later.
FREE Body Language ‘Cheat Sheet’:
Makes you a master at reading what people really think – Instant download contact me

Reading thoughts. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://library.thinkquest.org/26618/en-3.3.1=thoughts.htm
Chicago: Reading thoughts, http://library.thinkquest.org/26618/en-3.3.1=thoughts.htm (accessed September 14, 2011).

Sweet Things To Do For Your Boyfriend

Sweet Things To Do For Your Boyfriend


There are plenty of people who think that relationships should be one sided. They expect their boyfriend to take care of them and pamper them, failing to think about the needs of their significant other. It is important for boyfriends to be taken care of; doing things for your boyfriend will help to strengthen your relationship. Taking the time to do extra things for your boyfriend will show them that you care about what they do for you and how you feel about them. These five sweet things to do for your boyfriend will help you to show him how much you really care.

Buy Him Gifts
When people think about doing something sweet for their boyfriend, they think about making big, expensive purchases. Switch things up a bit by buying your boyfriend small but meaningful gifts. Buying him some of his favorite things, including foods, can be seen as a sweet and romantic gesture.

Make Him Dinner
There are plenty of couples that will always cook together, or will always go out. While it can be fun to cook with your loved one, surprise him with a meal. Making your boyfriend dinner can be a simple gesture with multiple benefits. Your boyfriend will see that you took the time to do something special for him, and he will appreciate it.

Get Sexy
It can be easy to settle in with a usual and normal intimate life. Try to spice things up a bit by trying something new, or by wearing some new lingerie. These small changes will be seen as sweet, romantic, and sexy.

Give Him a Massage
In today's world, both men and women are at a constant frenetic pace. It can be difficult to relax and de-stress after a long day in the office. Take the time to give your boyfriend a massage after a long day of work. This small gesture will only take a few minutes, and will help to relax your man. Your willingness to give that massage will be seen as a sweet and caring gesture.

Combine the massage with the tip on getting sexy and you may be swept off your feet by your man.

Take Him to a Game
Most women think about taking their boyfriend to the different things that they want to do. Switch things up a bit by buying tickets for your boyfriend's favorite sports team. He will be excited about the game, but will be more excited that you want to share that experience with him.

When people think about doing something sweet for their boyfriend, they think about buying him things. Many girlfriends and boyfriends fail to realize that sweet gestures do not have to be purchased. Simple gestures, such as massages or made dinner, can speak volumes to your boyfriend. Take the time to try out these different sweet things to do for your boyfriend. He will be sure to appreciate each and every one of them, helping to strengthen the bonds of your relationship.


Monica WHB (Watts Hopkins-Baldwin), MpsyD-c, FLE, BSHA
Contact Sites!
http://Therapists.PsychologyToday.com/rms/91210
http://www.premarriage.com
Sponsor Affiliate Click Below Magic Of Make Up

Is There a Secret to Relationships

Is There a Secret to Relationships
if there were a magic secret to relationships, someone would have already bottled it and made millions of dollars. But there are several ways to make your relationship strong and give it the best chance of lasting a lifetime. Most of them are common sense and some are just reminders of when the relationship was new. None of them is really a secret.

• Love. It’s not enough to love your partner, but you have to show them that you love them often. You should never be in a relationship if you don’t feel genuine love for someone, and feel comfortable expressing it.

• Respect. If you don’t respect the person you’re with, there’s little hope for the relationship. If you laugh at your partner, feel he or she is often a joke, dumb or worthy of some kind of scorn, then what’s the point?

• Kindness. Treat your partner with kindness always. A secret to relationships is to be as courteous when you’re alone and not feeling thrilled at that moment as you would with a stranger on the street.

• Thoughtfulness. Put your partner’s needs and desires at the top of your list. Little gestures are often some of the most powerful.

• Honesty. Lies can ruin a relationship quickly, even if they’re lies about nothing important. Don’t do anything deceptive and you’ll never have to lie in the first place.

All of those are important to a relationship and may be called the “secret to relationships.” But you really need all of them for a good relationship, and they’re things everyone already knows. The hard part can be figuring out how to express some of them.

Honest is pretty easy to show. Simply be open and honest during conversations. Don’t be afraid to let your partner see your true self, especially when you feel scared, sad, lonely or vulnerable.

Showing respect and showing kindness can go hand in hand. By treating your partner with respect, you show that you support them. You’ll back them up in their ideas and actions because you respect and believe in them.

Even when you don’t necessarily feel they’re doing the right thing, you can respect their decision and be kind in your words about it. Disagreeing pleasantly is a so-called secret to relationships.

Thoughtfulness and love can be expressed hand in hand, too. Telling your partner that you love him is one way to express love. But maybe he feels more loved when you reach out and rub his shoulders for a minute as you pass. Or you balance the checkbook so he doesn’t have to do it.

People perceive love differently. If you can find what your partner perceives as the most loving thing and do that, you’re expressing your love perfectly for that person. And you’re being thoughtful, too. You’re thinking of that person and trying to make them happy.

If you combine these things and apply them, then you’ve found the secret to relationships that can make your partnership a happy one.
Monica WHB (Watts Hopkins-Baldwin), MpsyD-c, FLE, BSHA
Contact Sites!
http://Therapists.PsychologyToday.com/rms/91210
http://groupspaces.com/TheApprenticeDoctorClub
http://www.premarriage.com
Sponsor Affiliate Click BelowMagic Of Make Up

Hate--When your partner won't listen to you...

• Hate--When your partner won't listen to you...‏The chief complaint, besides being unequally yolk, between most relationships, I hear as a CME, is that many partners complain about ‘you never listen to me.' However, as I continue my psychology studies and Family education practice with the National Family and Marriage Centers this complaint is very common, In addition as a newlywed wife I have recognized that usually the problem is much deeper than lack of attention.

Perhaps you can relate!
No Doubt, communication may be a factor issue however the root problem is about personal needs not being met or a longing for connection that isn't there.
If you feel that you aren't being listened to or understood,
there are a few client examples that seem to be pretty common.

The first is when your partner has a preconceived idea
of what you are thinking or feeling so they don't listen when
you speak. They make assumptions based on previous
relationships or the past and turn you off.

Another problem is that they are listening from their own
agenda and their own frame of reference. They are listening
to tell their story rather than listening to connect with
you.

A third is that they truly don't understand what you are
saying, thinking or feeling. They don't have enough
information or you are not clearly articulating your
feelings or thoughts.

A fourth scenario is when there is not enough safety and
trust in the relationship for one or both people to speak
openly and authentically to each other.

It's important to remember that these scenarios each
represent a dynamic between two people, with both people
taking part in the drama.

This was true for one couple that we know.

What we found was that he was listening but he shut down
emotionally because it wasn't safe for him to say what he was
really thinking.

When his wife wanted to buy and move into a new house by
a certain date, he was silent and didn't object although he
really felt that that wasn't a conscious way to make a major
purchase.

As a result, his wife thought he was agreeing with her all
along but in reality, he had simply withdrawn emotionally.

Although she was clear, there were assumptions on her part
and no conscious agreement between them. Fear prevented
him from revealing his true feelings.

How can you help other people to listen to you?

Remember you have no control over your partner's reactions,
thoughts or whether they do truly listen to you.

But it is always your responsibility to help your partner
understand you if you are trying to communicate something.

If you're trying to communicate something that your partner
doesn't understand, one way to help this situation is to simply
say these "Magic Words" to them...

"This is really important that I share this with you and I'm not
feeling that I am saying it in a way that you can understand me.
Would you be willing to help me to find a better way to share
my ideas so that you can understand me?"

Then ask them if they are willing to be open, patient and fully
present while you explain what you are trying to say in different
way.

Tell them that they don't have to agree with you but ask them
to try to understand.

This takes courage, presence and the intention to "do it
differently." It takes breaking the pattern in some way.

It takes you not becoming defensive and falling into old
patterns when you feel your needs is not being met and you
are not being understood.

Try these, as well as other "Magic Words," and see what a difference
it makes in your communication.

Our best to you,

Monica Watts-Hopkins, MpsyD-c, FLE, BSHA
Contact Sites!

http://www.premarriage.com

Sponsor Site Tell me More Monica

The Magic Words





Referance
Communication E-Course - DAY 3: 10 Communication Secrets for ... (n.d.). Retrieved from http://psychrelations.blogspot.com/2011/04/10-communication-secrets-for-creating
.html

Whats Love Got to Do !

Helping couples to effectively resolve conflict by practicing faith, work and love is the goal of a hope-focused marriage counselorCouples must understand boundaries and that only the Lord is able to meet all of their needs all of the time. Healthy relationships include both times of closeness and times of space for both parties involved. An understanding of covenantal rather than contractual commitment is necessary for couples to understand the commitment involved in a love filled marriage
Worthington, method or theory of counseling is a very important message to our daily life walk as GOD children because so many relationships focus are conditional and dependent on others behavior towards us. The old grandmother saying “Treat People the way you want to be Treated “ is a saying of the past, now it’s more like how other people behave toward us. Unfortunate as the "phileo" is a more common type of love couples focus on; therefore when the going” GET tough, the Tough it GONE!” This is very different than than other theory’s that target on the problem or conditions in which the love mention in Hope Focused Marriage it more a agape, love extended through ones faith. Agape type of love that’s experience with GOD through Jesus Christ, Agape love gives and sacrifices without expecting but trusting/Hope. Love is willingness to value and to avoid devaluing people that springs from a caring other focused heart (pg. 33) According to E. Worthington; faith involves trust in one’s partner (pg.34) in which trust may be dismissed in a trouble marriage because the parents are focused on the spouse negative behavior.
Hope Focused-Marriage Counseling expresses love as defined in relation to the Bible. However, the motivation or drive of wanting is commitment power to love Agape and faith works. Agape type of love is only depending on the power of God. May the Lord direct your hearts into the love of God and into the steadfastness of Christ?

Chapter 1. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.people.vcu.edu/~eworth/manuals/leader_manual_hope_nographics.doc
Thessalonians 3 (Blue Letter Bible: NASB - New American ... (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.blueletterbible.org/Bible.cfm?b=2Th&c=3&v=1&t=NASB

Without the presence of the Spirit there is no conviction, no regeneration, no sanctification, and no cleansing, no acceptable works. W.A. Criswell