DON'T PRETEND EVERYTHING'S OKAY
The default mode for most of us women -- especially when we are very interested in a man -- is to simply put up with what's happening and stuff down our feelings for fear of scaring him away.
You're also more prone to doing this when you've had a string of unsuccessful relationships.
The older you get and the more heartbreak you endure, the more you want to "not mess this up" -- and so you keep quiet.
You keep it "under wraps" -- even when you're seething with anger.
You say "sure!" when he suggests something you really don't feel comfortable doing.
You pretend it doesn't bother you when he isn't giving you the time and affection you need.
But doing this actually prevents you from connecting with a man and forging a deeper relationship with him!
Why?
Because he never gets to see what makes you tick.
He never gets to see -- or EXPERIENCE -- what makes you YOU.
Not just that, but the longer you go without speaking your feelings, the more you start to resent your man.
And then you start unconsciously becoming "cold" to him in a way that he can sense...and this in turn pushes him away.
DON'T MAKE HIM WRONG
Often, and especially when we've been swallowing whatever it is that's bothering us about a man, we'll end up simmering with so much anger that one day we just can't take it.
That's when, despite our best efforts, our emotions take over and everything comes out in an explosion of feelings.
What comes out is often something that sounds like an accusation to him: "How could you have spent the whole weekend with me and then not called for two whole days?!"
All he hears is that he was wrong. That's when he becomes defensive, shuts down, and can't hear you anymore.
That's also when, unfortunately, we end up with a man who becomes distant from us or pulls away altogether.
We're left holding all the cards, feeling awful, and thinking we're entirely to blame and can't make relationships work.
There's a much better way...
DO SPEAK YOUR FEELINGS AND ISSUE THE "MAGIC PHRASE"
Once you learn this, it will save you so much heartache and frustration.
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Monica Tell Me more cLICK HERE
Monica Watts-Hopkins,MpsyD-c, FLE, BSHA
Contact Sites!
http://www.premarriage.com
WWW.TINYURL.COM/DOCTORMONICA
http://tinyurl.com/drmonicafoundation
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